Although divorce ends your marriage, you and your former spouse will always be in a relationship if you have children together. It’s called co-parenting, and it’s an amazing experience to share. You’ll work together to provide parental guidance to the kids and plan their future milestones, such as school, college, and maybe even a wedding. You can even do it from different cities or time zones if life takes you in that direction!
Co-parenting lets your children enjoy a close, loving, and stress-free relationship with both of their parents. Here are 5 tips that will help you rock this new relationship with your ex while the kids reap the benefits.
1. Let the past stay there
You know those time capsules you fill with stuff that defines your era and then seal for 10, 20, or even 100 years? Treat your bad relationship memories like that. Bury them away and forget about the “open in 2129” part. Even better, forget where you figuratively buried them! Your kids will benefit from seeing you and their other parent getting along and taking care of them without any grudges affecting the relationship.
2. Keep communications clear and open
Have you ever sent someone a text and had them take it completely out of context? (We certainly have!) The best way to hold an important discussion is to call or meet in person. Direct communication is the best way to avoid mixed messages and keep your co-parenting relationship strong.
3. Be mindful of who may overhear
There will be times when you and your ex aren’t going to agree on an issue involving the kids. It’s totally fine, too – respectful differences of opinion are a part of every co-parenting relationship. But until you can reach a compromise, hold these discussions where the kids can’t hear you. Little ears are bigger than we think!
4. Set a great example
When you prioritize your children and approach your co-parenting duties with maturity and enthusiasm, they will get the message that their parents may no longer be married, but everyone can and should still get along. It’s an incredibly positive thing for them to witness.
5. Focus on the good in one another
Although being married didn’t work out, your spouse had (and probably still has) qualities that attracted you to him or her in the first place. Was she a good listener? Did he or she always have advice that took a weight off your shoulders? With time and patience, you can build a relationship based on mutual respect, and your kids will love you for it.
At the end of the day, you and your ex will always be in each other’s lives as you work together to turn your beautiful children into smart, competent, and successful adults. Although it will require commitment, respect, and dedication from both of you, having a positive co-parenting relationship after a divorce is something you can definitely look forward to, and we’d love it if you let us help!
At McCracken Kuhn Marks PLLC, we believe that giving your kids a happy and secure future is the most important thing in the world. That’s why we put so much thought and care into parenting plans. Let us help you create the foundation for a happy family and a co-parenting relationship that rocks! All you have to do is contact us and we’re there!
McCracken Kuhn Marks PLLC
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